Just never mind, it's too hard.
Not the actual being together (although let's face it...there are days that maybe a struggle too!) We have never made it a priority or had a routine or ritual. Life just happens. He has his own business, which means many a times are we together as a "family" while he is on the phone with clients, other businesses, etc. It's just how it is. Since we live in the beautiful north west, weather can also dictate a work schedule. Not that he stops in the rain, snow, or ice, but if it is a nice Saturday or Sunday; he can be found pouring concrete or rolling trusses.
Many a days does he come home exhausted, worn out. Only to sit up at night working on bids for future jobs, sending emails, getting price quotes. Then to get up before the sun to head off to put it all together.
He works extremely hard and has sacrificed so much.
Now a days with my sister and her therapy schedule thrown into the mix, it just makes things that much more crazy with the family. And getting someone to be with all of them is a little tricky. There are a limited number of resources available to us while she is in her recovery.
The other day my dad offered to take all three so Ben and I could be a lone for a bit. He said, "You choose either Friday or Saturday just let me know what day and what time." Uh....I don't really know what to do with that.
So when I talk to my husband, "Not Saturday, it's poker night." My husbands once a month testosterone gathering. Which really is fine by me. I am not one for wanting to be out late, and by late I mean past 7 pm. By that time I would much rather be on my couch in my sweats cuddling with my girls. And I would rather do something during the day anyway. (Hence us never doing anything!)
It was just too hard to try to coordinate. So just never mind forget it.
As I am sitting in the car prepping myself for another doctors appointment....I hear it. A woman, like me. A wife, like me. A mother, like me.
Talking about how she has had to fight for that time with her husband. Not that she was fighting with him. She says no to others and their things so she can say yes to her husband.
Yet even when offered time away for a moment, it still seems hard...why is that? Why can I easily fill in my hours of piano lessons, swimming lessons, physical therapy, speech therapy, make dinner, clean up dinner....yet one on one time with the person I have a made a covenant with God to be with forever...eh?
What do you do to make sure you have that time alone with your spouse?